The Single Girl Survival Guide: Ditching Prince Charming

Every woman out there knows the ideal that is imprinted on us from when we were little girls.  The picture of a man on a white horse coming to rescue the damsel in distress.  He is charming, handsome, strong- a protector and provider.  He loves your flaws more than your strengths.  He is Prince Charming- and he does not exist.

Okay, maybe that is a bit harsh.  There are men that are handsome, charming, and strong- but most men do not start out that way.  They grow into the remarkable men that they are, as the years go by they identify more and more about themselves and they become their own Prince Charming.  I’m not going to say that you, as a woman, are going to be able to mold and shape a man to be the person that you want him to be.  If you think that at the beginning of a relationship, you are probably dooming yourself from the start.  You are never going to change a man and make him into the fairy tale Prince Charming.  However, you can still find your own prince charming.

As women- we have this laundry list of things that we want to find in the ideal man.  When I was eighteen, I was asked to write out a list of all of the things that I thought were necessities in a man.  The list got somewhere into the 100’s- looking back at it now, it was ridiculous, but at the time I thought it was perfectly acceptable and even possible to find one man that would have every single one of these traits.  Ultimately, I was looking for someone that could only be found in the movies (and I even doubt a bit that this man was created in any movies either).

The idea of ditching prince charming is mainly about becoming realistic about the things that you want.  Instead of a top twenty list- narrow it down to a top ten list of things that you must have.  If you find that the things that you want the most are the things that you don’t want- that is alright too.  Just remember that you don’t want to eliminate the man that is actually right for you, by tossing him aside for something inconsequential- like hair color or shoe size.  There is honestly such a thing as being too picky.

So- forget the Disney ideal, forget that man that you have dreamed of since you were two.  Focus on the things that are really important and open yourself up to all of the possibilities that the world offers to you.  Putting up your blinders and looking at men that are only Brad Pitt look-a-likes, with abs of steel and crystal blue eyes- will deter you from the guy that sits in the next cubicle over at work and is really a nice guy, a good guy.  However, you are out there looking for bad boys that you are hoping to turn into good men, when you should just be looking at the man that is right beside you.


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